Dear Chelsea

Disclaimer: This post idea comes from my friend Sarah Burke. I read her letter to her mom and knew that is just what I needed and wanted to do on this day so here it is:

Dearest Chelsea,

It has been five years ago today, that you left your earthly home to return to the loving arms of our Heavenly Father. A lot of things have happened in 5 years. We got a dog, we moved, TJ graduated and went on a mission, Grandma got married, we went to California twice and also New York, Mckena got her braces off and Shayla got hers on, and dad got a new job just to name a few. But you already know that because your somehow right here with us. You are never far from our thoughts or our hearts. We feel you with us often and I am so grateful for those tender moments.

Being the mom, I often wonder what you are busy doing. I am always comforted in knowing that you are happy and not alone.

Being human, I often wonder if you never left what you would be doing. I picture you in college pursuing your nursing degree and being successful because you are so smart. I also imagine you would be married, because any guys that would meet you would fall in love with not only your outer beauty but your inner beauty that would just radiate an entire room! I could possibly even be a grandma by now too, because most, if not all your friends have a baby or two, or at least one on the way. You will be an amazing mom. Being the oldest in our family and also the oldest cousin to 19, you were always taking care of someone. I picture you supporting the girls in all their dance activities and being the supportive big sister. Giving them advice and guidance, doing their hair for school dances, painting nails, all the girly stuff you use to do together.They wear your same perfume. Mckena and Shayla are so close, and the best of friends. I know it is because they have a clear perspective of how precious family is. They are often told how much they look like you. They just beam when they hear that. When I take pictures of the two of them, I imagine you standing right there with them, uniting in sisterhood! When they dance, they dance with an angel.... you. 

And then there is TJ, who always reminds me how much he misses your late night talks, and refuses to take on the "oldest" child role. Tells me all the time, that that was your job. Just like Nicolle won't claim the oldest cousin title either, because that too belongs to you. TJ needs you, so stay close to him and do what you can for him. Now he is the one we have to practice parenting with. I don't know how to parent adult children..so you can help me!
Dad took the longest to heal. Being the fixer that he is, couldn't fix this and felt a bit lost. He is better now and is amazed at the influence you have on others. He wishes you were here to help with the math homework, because as you know, I am no help at all in that department so it is all him!

Facebook has re-invented staying connected. Remember how you begged and begged for a myspace page?  I am confident you would have a facebook profile and would probably be tweeting too.

The Temple continues to be a place of refuge and peace for me. I selfishly go sometimes just because I know I will feel you there. And whoever says spirit bodies can't hug, hasn't felt one from you. I cherish those!  Thank you for being such an amazing example to our family. We love you so much and are so grateful for the time you were here with us. I can't begin to imagine how joyful the day will be when we are once again reunited. 

 Although for now, continue to be with us as we push on in this earthly life, doing what we can and should to be where you are. Thank you for making me a better parent, by teaching me what truly matters, and I try to be a better person by treating others as you did. Stay close to us.
Because of this trial we are surrounded by such good friends and family. It is a blessing we are forever grateful for and hope that we can pay forward all the acts of kindness. You are sure loved girl!!
As you know, this day is also Aunt Tammy's birthday. She sent me this email fist thing this morning:

I woke up this mornig to a "happy birthday" kiss from Paul and of course then thoughts of our dear, sweet Chelsea.  I just wanted to let you know that I am so grateful for her!!  Her time here on this earth was so very short, yet so very effective and meaningful to everyone who knew her, and especially those that loved her as we did.  Thank you Chelsea for teaching me such valuable lessons only you could so tenderly teach me, you are an angel and what I learned from you will always be one of the greatest gifts I will ever receive!!  We love you Chelsea:)!!!!
Tammy


See what I mean? Well, I will let you get on with your day. I love you from the bottom to the very tip of my heart! I cherish each memory and honor each moment I have with you. So thankful for eternal families, because that means you get to be my daughter forever!!
Love, Mom

Celebrate With Angels

Today is my sweet Chelsea's birthday. Twenty three years old in our earthly time. Oh how I wish she was here to celebrate the day with, and yet somehow she is. I know in my heart she is celebrating and dancing with angels and is her happy little self! I love and miss her so much. This week is a tough one, with her birthday and her passing so close. But I too, have angels all around to help ease the sorrow and to feel joy with tender mercies at every tear drop. Happy Birthday Chelsea!